Liberty Pearl. Pronouns: she, her, hers.

Alfred's Coffee - Silverlake

We live in a time of cultural progression and increased expressive freedom. I truly believe that this period of time will go down in history as one of the most pro-liberal ages the West has seen. For this, I salute us, and for this, I am lucky and eternally grateful. My era does not restrict me to skirts that cover my ankles, my culture does not threaten me with public stoning if I commit infidelity, my gender identity is not dependent on my biological makeup. Nothing is black and white anymore. However, could it be argued that we have become too intent on expanding our personal rights, so far that we are putting our society in danger?

I sat in my boyfriend Corbin’s coffee shop last week, enjoying my free croissant and triple shot Americano, half-heartedly reading through an assignment when a man walked in. He was talking loudly on the phone, chattering away to his friend on the line whose ears I now say prayers for before bedtime. He had a slight femininity to him - a slightly high pitched voice, a colourful patterned shirt and a patent backpack. Corbin was working the barista shift, which is the most brutal on Friday mornings- impatient customers, a feeling of weekend in the air, not to mention the 6am start which is not kind on the brain, and makes one’s heart a little less warm.

“Two coffees and a Kombucha…” Phone still at his ear, he swiped his card at the checkout dismissively. Corbin, with his immaculate Southern manners said “Yes, sir,” with the little charming head-bob-bow thing he does when he talks to customers. The man sighed loudly and stopped Corbin as he was turning to the coffee drip and said “Don’t assume my gender. I identify as a woman. That’s a punishable offense, you know…” And with that, she turned on her heel and stood at the door to resume her phone call in peace, away from the evil politically-incorrect Texan barista who, stunned, poured out the drinks before retreating to the back for a smoke break.

After this incident, I started doing some research on gender fluidity - “of, relating to, or being a person whose gender identity is not fixed. There are also people who identify as “gender fluid,” a mix of both genders, and may feel more male on some days and more female on others.” This increasingly relevant topic is so interesting to me. I am very liberal myself. I believe that people should be able to live how they want, with whomever they please: lesbian, transgender, demisexual, pansexual, gay, ok! However, what I cannot stand is that as a straight white woman, I have to watch what I say so carefully, almost feeling embarrassed by my conventional identity and orientation.

In a BBC open forum titled “Would Gender Neutral Language Be Better for Mankind”, a non-binary (i.e. non female, non male human being) person, explains that they are offended when referred to as she, he or it, and demands others to use the “they/them” pronoun. This person is questioned on many counts by politicians and people who run workplaces, arguing that being forced to use this pronoun would be “imposing an ideological political system” on those who cannot and should not be punished for not understanding these new and complicated standards of speech.

At what point will the expansion of genders or sexual orientation stop? According to the online publication, aPath, there are now 63 Genders which have been broken down by three variables: physical features, personality aspect and preference (attraction to). These genders range from the classifications of male and female to classifications such as “Masculine Bisexual Androfemale” or “Androgine Female-Attracted Androdite”. While I am in no way saying that I have a particular problem with people identifying as these newly established genders, I do have a problem with being ridiculed when I fail to address someone who I see to be a man as a “Androgine Heterosexual Androfemale”. Apart from the fact that it is a mouthful, I feel well within my right to respectfully speak my own truth without being told that I am committing a punishable offense for doing so.

https://apath.org/63-genders/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OwvhGfbeo1Y